Broiled Eel Liver aka EVIL

oh hell no.

By now a little sick Cookbad

Please make the flavor leave my mouth. Please please. 2 diet cokes and some mouthwash and I still have a flavor reminiscent of bile in my mouth. It most likely is actually bile. Eel bile.

Nice.

So, this isn't going to be the offal I use for the Paper Chef Challenge.

WTF is that white pearly sac? I'd be willing to bet a cup of demi-glace it is a bile sac.

Two failed candy making attempts

Honey fudge





1kg Granulated sugar
410g tin of evaporated milk
100ml water
a pinch of salt
4heaped Tbsp honey
Veg oil for greasing a tin
100g Butter
Put the sugar, evaporated milk and water in a saucepan. The pan should be no more than about a third full at this stage, because the hot mixture will bubble dramatically later. Place over a low heat and stir till the sgar has dissolved. Then stir in the salt and honey. Stand the sugar thermometer in the pan.
Raise the heat and bring the sugar mixture to a fierce, bubbling boil, stirring every half a minute or so, to ensure it isn’t catching on the bottom of the pan. When it reaches 116c, turn off the heat and allow the mixture to cool for a few minutes. Oil your tin lightly
Cut the butter, into 5 or 6 pieces, and drop them into the mixture. As you do stir vigorously with the wooden spoon. The butter will melt into the thickening syrup, keep stirring. As the mixture cools and thickens, it will start to become grainey. Now it’s time to pour it into the tin. Don’t hang around, or it will start to set while you are pouring it.
Use a sharp knife to Mark off the fudge into squares before it has completely set. This means pressing the knife partly but not completely through the fudge. It will then be very easy to break into squares when it has cooled.

This is from River Cottage Family Cookbook.

Cinder Toffee Honeycomb



400g caster sugar
100ml runny honey
2tbsp liquid glucose
oil, for greasing
1 ½ tsp bicarbonate of soda

Place the sugar, honey and glucose in a heavy based pan with 100ml water. Place the pan on the heat and, using a sugar thermometer, bring to a boil and boil to 160c/325f (a light caramel)
Grease a large baking tray with oil while the sugar is boiling. When the pan reaches the required temperature remove from the heat, quickly add the bicarb and whisk in speedily.
Working quickly, pour the mixture onto the tray – it will start to bubble up quite dramatically right away. Leave to cool. When cold, break up and mix with ice cream, or to make hokey pokey, dice into chunks and coat in dark chocolate.

From James Martin - Desserts.

These were two failed candy making attempts. The fudge, actually came out as toffee. That was interesting. The cinder toffee was just bad.

After these two attempts, I finally realized that my candy thermometer is not working properly. When I was making the cinder toffee I could tell when the sugar was ready. It smelled like it does when I make peanut brittle, but the thermometer said that it wasn’t there yet, so I waited and waited, and by the time the reading said it was ready, it was totally burned.

Oh well, you live and learn. I’m going to get a new thermometer and try these again, because they looked really promising. Also, the cider toffee is hilarious to make. If you try this, use the biggest pot you have. When you put the bicarbonate of soda in, it’s like a scene from “The Blob”. No joke, it grows and grows and it’s fast and totally out of control. Even after you mix it and pour it out on the tray, it still keeps growing. I thought it was going to take over my whole house.

I won the battle in the end, though it tasted awful and burned, but it didn’t eat anybody.

When I get a new Thermometer, I will try these again, and let you know if they come out better.

Oxtail

meh. .
I used to have this fantastic oxtail stew from some Puerto Rican amazing greasy spoon in alphabet city. . .. those were the days. . .

This, not so awesome. But I made some crucial mistakes.
1. most of the oxtail I got was from the very end of the tail. Ask for the biggest ones you see. i.e. not from the very end of the tail. Don't let the butcher sneak in the small ones. If they come pre-packed, ask the butcher for them and don't take pre-packed for an answer.
2. I let them sit in my freezer for a long long time. Maybe a month. Not nice to meat.

here is the recipe.
Folks on epicurious.com love it

Stewed Beef with carrots

700g braising beef
2-3 carrots
1 piece of dried orange peel, soaked
1 spring onion, chopped
1tbsp grated fresh root ginger
2 star anise
450ml water
Seasoning
3tbsp soy sauce
1/4 tsp salt
1tbsp rice wine or dry sherry

Cut the beef into 2 inch cubes. Place in boiling water and scald for 1 minute, then remove with a slotted spoon and rinse again.
Peel the carrots and cut them into chunks. Drain and rinse the dried orange peel.
Place all of the ingredients, including the seasoning ingredients, in a saucepan with the water, cover and bring to a boil. Reduce the heat and simmer for 1 to 1.5 hours or until the meat is tender. Add more water if necessary while the meat is cooking.

Oh my god, yuck. I’m sorry, but yuck. As it turns out, I really don’t like things that are cooked with dried orange peel. It is just a matter of taste, I’m sure plenty of people would find it good, I am just not one of them. It wasn’t inedible, and I could tell that it was meant to taste that way, but this is the second time I have tried a dish that had dried orange peel and twice I have hated it.

I like marmalade, but I think I will stick to that alone for my orange peel intake.

Poached Pear

2 pears, halved and cored but not peeled
4oz/115ml apple juice
4oz/115ml water
1 cinnamon stick
6 cloves
2 dates, stones removed, thinly sliced
4 tsp natural yogurt
Cinnamon or nutmeg
Trim a small slice from the round side of the pear halves so they will lie flat, cut side up. Place pears in a small frying pan or saucepan.
Add apple juice, water, cinnamon stick, and cloves. Cover, bring to a boil, reduce heat, and simmer gently for about 5-10min until the pears are just tender, but not mushy or overcooked. Remove pears to a serving dish and keep warm.
Add the dates to the juices in the pan and boil for 5 min, uncovered.
Spoon the yogurt into the pear core holes and spoon the sauce over all. Sprinkle with cinnamon and nutmeg if desired and serve warm or chilled.

These were from The Vegetarian Times Cookbook.
We had some pears that were about to go bad, so I took a quick look to see if there was anything I could do with them. I found this recipe, but I didn’t have any dates. I figured I’d try it with figs instead, and I added a bit of honey too, because figs aren’t nearly as sweet as dates.

This was a valiant effort, but a big failure. Dates, when you boil them like this will mostly melt. I imagine the sauce would have been sticky and sweet and lovely. Figs stay in big chunks, and do very little to enhance any part of this. Also, they weren’t the best pears to begin with.

I wouldn’t go so far as to say that this was inedible, but I wouldn’t want to have to eat it again.
If I had used dates, and maybe a little red wine too, then I bet it would be great.

Not the recipe’s fault.

Macaroni Bake

AKA: All Wrong Casserole


2 tbsp vegetable oil
1 medium onion, chopped
450g minced beef
2x225g tins chopped tomatoes
2 tbsp tomato puree
2 tsp chopped basil
salt and ground pepper
100g dried macaroni

Cheese Sauce
50g butter
50g plain flour
600ml milk
150g cheddar cheese, grated

Topping
50g cheddar cheese
2 packets of ready salted crisps (potato chips) finely crushed

Heat the oil in a pan and fry the onion gently until soft. Add the beef and fry until browned, breaking up any lumps with a wooden spoon.
Stir in the tomatoes, tomato puree, basil, salt, and pepper to taste. Bring to a boil, stirring constantly. Simmer for 15 minutes.
Meanwhile cook the macaroni in boiling salted water until tender. Drain, fold into the meat sauce, and then turn into a casserole pan.
To make the cheese sauce, melt the butter in the pan, add the flour and cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Remove from the heat and gradually add the milk, beating all the time. Return to the heat and bring to the boil, stirring, then add the grated cheese, salt and pepper to taste. Simmer until thick.
Pour the sauce over the meat and macaroni. Mix together the topping ingredients, and sprinkle them over the cheese sauce. Bake uncovered in the preheated oven for 30 min. Serve hot with a green salad.

I know this looks awful… and it kind of was, but I had to try it. My son’s school (he’ll be starting there in September), was having a summer fair type thing, and they were selling these cookbooks to help raise money. The recipes in it were all from kids at the school (and their families obviously). So cute. So you can see why I couldn’t resist buying one of the books. As for this recipe, well, I never did get to try “Hamburger Helper” when I was growing up, and this looked like it would fill that need in me to eat crap food made from ground beef.

I think there is a way that this could have been better. For starters, I would have drained the fat off when cooking the beef. I would have added some green pepper too. Also, I think, less beef, more pasta. As for the sauce, there was just too much of it. I would have used less, but with more cheese, and then forget the crisps altogether.

Still it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Linguine with crab

This was bad, but it wasn't really the recipe's fault


400g/14oz linguine
4 tbsp Extra Virgin olive oil
3 garlic cloves, finely chopped
2 large red chillies, finely sliced
250g/9oz fresh crab meat
150ml/1/4 pint white wine
Small bunch of flat leaf parsley, finely chopped
Sea salt and fresh ground black pepper

Bring a pot of water to the boil and cook the linguine until al dente.
Meanwhile, heat 3 tbsp of the oil in a large pan, add the garlic and chillies. Pour in the wine and leave to simmer until reduced by half. Season with salt and pepper and stir in the parsley.
When the pasta is done, drain it and return it to the pan. Add the crab mixture and toss together well.

It’s not really the recipe’s fault, but this came out totally bland and disappointing. The problem is that I used tinned crabmeat that was on sale instead or fresh. The fact is, fresh crabmeat is a whole different food then it’s canned counterpart. I should have known better. I also used dried chili pepper instead of fresh. I’ve found that in most cases, that works fine, but in this recipe, the chili was more then just added heat, it was the base of the recipe, and dried couldn’t cut it.

I think if you made this recipe correctly, it would probably be really good, but the cheap/mild version was not even worth thinking about.

Here are some hilarious mistakes…

The lesson learned here is that you really should pay attention to the specified size of the cooking tin. This cake expands while cooking, then sinks back down as it cools, so if you make it in a pan that just fits the batter, it will all expand right out the top, then sink down so that you just have a very thin layer of chocolate goo left in the pan, and lots of chocolate stalagmites all around the tin.

On the up side, the stalagmites were really really tasty!

This was supposed to be for a bake sale at my son's playgroup school. Luckily, I had made some other things too (I'll post them soon).




This was my attempt to make marmite popcorn. I used to hate marmite with a passion, but then I tried the limited edition Guiness marmite (thanks cookbad!), and I became totally addicted. Now I want to figure out how to put it in everything. I actually got a marmite cookbook (some recipes coming soon). This was not from the book. I wanted some popcorn, and I wanted it to taste like marmite, so I tried to cook them together. Turns out Marmite becomes something akin to molten lava when cooked this way. There was so much smoke I had to put the pot outside in the backyard where it continued to make sizzling noises in the rain for about 5 or 10 min.

I managed to save the pot.

If anyone out there can tell me how to get marmite onto my popcorn, I would love to know.



This last one is not exactly a mistake, it’s just gross. I like to let my three year old take an active part in food choice and preparation. It’s great because it makes him more excited about food, but this was probably going a bit far. This is Peanut butter and jelly couscous. Here’s how it came up… “mommy, I love Peanut butter, and I love the red jelly and I love couscous. I want to make peanut butter and jelly and couscous on my plate please”. Actually he ate the whole bowl, so I guess you could call it a success, except for how it was gross.

Houmous Mash

I don’t even have a picture of this one. My husband said I have to blog it though because it’s a great story involving triumph over adversity… and yummy houmous.

2x400g cans of chickpeas
50g/2oz feta
1 tbsp oil

Tip the chick peas into a sieve, and pour over boiling water to warm them, then whiz them in a food processor with the feta and the oil. Add a few drops of water to loosen if necessary, then season to taste.

From Good Food Magazine. Sometimes their recipes are so good it’s amazing… this was NOT one of those times!!!! This came out so bad, I was actually shocked. I was going to serve it with some left over sausages, and was kind of out of time, so in the end I just made it into an enormous batch of houmous. You can never have too much Houmous in the house.

Bad recipe, saved only by ignoring it completely.

Mushroom Gougere

Kind of weird looking, kind of not great, but the pastry was oh so much fun.



Pastry:
115g/4oz flour
2.5ml/1/2tsp salt
75g/3oz/6tbsp butter
200ml/7oz cup cold water
3 eggs, beaten
75g/3oz diced gruyere or mature Gouda cheese

Filling:
1 small onion, sliced
1 carrot coarsely grated
225g/8oz mushrooms, sliced
40g/3tbs butter
5ml/1tsp tikka or mild curry paste
25g/1oz/2tbsp flour
300ml/1&1/4 cup milk
30ml/2tbsp fresh parsley
Salt and pepper
30ml/2tbsp flaked almonds


Preheat to 200c/400f, and grease a 9 inch pan

Pastry:
Sift the flour and salt unto a piece of greaseproof paper.
In a large pan heat the butter and water till the butter just melts, but do not let the water boil. Fold the paper and shoot all the flour in at once. With a wooden spoon beat the mixture rapidly until the lumps become smooth. Let cool for 10 minutes.

Beat the eggs gradually into the mixture until you have a soft, but still quite stiff consistency, you may not need all the egg.

Stir in the cheese, then spoon the mixture round the sides of the dish, put aside.

To make the filling:
Saute the vegetables in butter for 5 minutes. Stir in the curry paste and the flour. Gradually stir in the milk and heat until thickened. Mix in the parsley, season well then pour into the center of the pastry.
Bake 35-40 minutes, sprinkling on the almonds for the last 5 minutes or so.

This was really not great. I found that the filling was kind of generic, like it didn’t really know what it wanted to be. The pastry on the other hand, was gorgeous. It’s the first time I’ve made this kind. If you are out here then I could tell you that it’s probably the way they make Yorkshire puddings (or at least similar). If you are in the States, I don’t know what I could compare it to. Something to note, when it is raw it will just be the thinnest strip of dough, but when you put it in the oven, it totally explodes into this big puffy pillow of pastry. So Much Fun.

Don’t bother with this one though, I will find something better to do with that dough.

Pickled Eggs- The Update

Last month I made pickled eggs.
These turned out to be absolutely beautiful, but not so tasty.
The chipolte peppers in adobo sauce were a mistake. Mixing smokey with pickled is weird. I'll make another version sometime soon.

Corn bread muffins

pictured with maple barbecue chops and spanish beans

Preheat to 220c/425f

Whisk together:
1&1/4 cups cornmeal
3/4 cup flour
1-4 tbsp sugar
2tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
in another bowl whisk together:
2 large eggs
2/3 cup milk
2/3 cup buttermilk
add the wet ingredients to the dry and stir until moistened. Fold in:
2-3 Tbsp warm melted butter or oil.
Scrape into pan and tilt to spread evenly. Bake 10 –12 minutes if using a muffin pan, 20-25 minutes in a square pan. Use a toothpick to test doneness

Kind of lame. The texture was just right, but there was little to no flavor. I had every intention of adding some fresh corn and some cheese, but totally forgot. I think it would be pretty good if I added that next time, but I think I might need a new recipe too. I got this from The Joy Of Cooking, which to me is like getting information from an encyclopedia. It will definitely have something there, but chances are it will really just be a jumping off point. I do like a lot of recipes in there, but when it comes to specialist stuff, it tends to run kind of mainstream. I’ll have to work on this one.

Grey Ice Cream (Sort of)

grey ice cream

recipe # 168

It turns out that dairy-free/vegan 'ice cream' isn't 'awesome', like some people claim. At least mine wasn't.

Here is the recipe that I took from PPK:
Vegan Soy Ice Cream
1 tetra box firm silken tofu (like Mori-Nu) -or- 8 ounces soy yogurt
Between 3/4 to 1 cup plain soy milk
1/3 cup maple syrup or brown rice syrup (or a combination)
2 tsp vanilla

Combine all 4 main ingredients in a blender or food processor and blend until thoroughly combined and smooth. Blend in any desired flavoring ingredients (see below). Pour into your ice cream machine, and freeze following the manufacturer's instructions.

I made a banana walnut version and it was bad. Maybe a ginger version would be nice. I might try it again.

This shouldn't reflect badly on the PPK. EVerything else I have made from that sight has been pretty terrific.

This is Why I am CookBad

fuckin fuck!

My evil oven tried to eat my dinner itself. This was just after my evil knife tried to eat part of my finger.

Mushroom Shepherd's Pie
Filling
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 large onion, diced
3 cloves of garlic, minced
1 carrot, peeled and diced
2 stalks of celery, diced
1 teaspoon sage
1 teaspoon tellicherry pepper ground or regular ground black pepper
12 oz. mushrooms, your choice roughly chopped
if you have any tomatoes laying around chop them up
5 oz. frozen peas
1/2 red wine or vegi stock
tablespoon of corn starch
couple shakes of worcestershire sauce
salt or liquid amino to taste

Topping
approx. 2-3 cups of white potatoes, I am using red because that is what I have on hand. You could also use cauliflower, parsnips or rutabega in place of potatoes.
garlic salt
earth balance margarine, or one that is trans-fat free
couple shakes of worcestershire sauce

In a large cast iron pan add 2 tablespoons of olive oil. Cook the garlic, onions, carrots and celery until onions are translucent. Add mushrooms, tomatoes, sage, tellicherry, and salt. Cook this mixture down until all liquid is gone and brown stuff start to stick to the pan. Add half the red wine to deglaze. Repeat with second half of wine. Cook 2 more minutes. Add a couple of shakes of worcestershire sauce, the corn starch, turn off heat and stir.

Boil a bunch of potatoes. Whip them with garlic salt, butter (or better earth balance spread), worcestershire sauce and ground black pepper. Whip them. I used a food processor.

Put pie filling (mushroom stuff) in a pie pan. Pour the whipped potatoes on top and gently spread them evenly to cover all the pie filling.

Bake at 350 for 25 minutes.

Serves 4 or 5

I spent a good hour chopping and hatching my plan for how to make a wonderful hearty hepherd's Pie without any meat or dairy. It would have been delicious. I know this because I tasted the filling and I tasted the delicious whipped potato topping. It was when the oven got involved problems started. As usual, it started smoking, so I look the pie out of the oven and decided to use my trusty broiler instead. That is when I dropped the pie.

I wept.

Then I decided to say hell with it and have a liquid dinner.

My Oven. A Love/Hate Relationship

The oven in my new home is a thing of beauty. It is a Wedgwood 40 inch stove from the 1950s. When the gas guy came to turn on the pilot lights for the heat, water heater and my oven he told me that it is a wonderful stove and I might like it more than my last one because it has a low flame setting as opposed to many more modern ovens that have one flame setting and turn the heat on and off to keep the oven temp within a certain range. (long sentence that one was. . . ) It also has a griddle a broiler on one side, the oven on the other and actual cooking instructions on the door of the oven.

The oven door interior has cooking instructions

I like cooking on the stove top. I have enjoyed the convenience of the broiler. The oven, however is non-compliant. I have no idea what temp I am setting it. It smokes--terribly when the tiniest bit of food escapes from it's container. The other day it cooke mac and cheese that would noramlly take 2 hours in about 30 minutes. Not well, either. It has pissed me off a few too many times. Baking is becoming a fucking liability. I'm going to get a grill.

This is how puff pastry makes me feel. . .

mad

I blame it, not me. It is it's fault it doesn't bake up into a delicious meal. It sucks, not me. I now know this.

Fuck you, Puff Pastry.

evil terrible puff pastry

I tried to make pork and curry pie. Obviously it did not work out. I have most of the filling left over and am going to make a shepard's pie with it

My Complete Ineptitude with Puff Pastry

a good example of how not to treat puff pastry

recipe #126

I was trying to make Cha Shao Su (one of many english spellings), a wonderful dim sum savory puff pastry treat filled with pork. I recently had it at Diamond on Eighth (a so-so dim sum place) in Brooklyn Chinatown. I had it once before from some Chinese restaurant on the upper west side that only will make it on Saturday and Sunday morning. It is a potent hangover cure.

what Cha Shao Su should look like

The filling is terrific. I had it cover it an put it in the way back of the fridge to keep from eating it while to evil puff pastry thawed.

It also doubles as a filling for Cha Shao bao:
Cha Shao Su filling
2 tsp. oyster sauce
¾ tsp. dark soy sauce
2 tsp. ketchup
1 ½ tsp. sugar
1 tbsp. Shao Hsing wine
½ tsp. toasted sesame oil
2 tsp. peanut oil.
1 small onion, diced finely
1 tsp. fresh ginger, minced
1 clove garlic, minced
1/3 pound Chinese roast pork, diced small

Combine first six ingredients and set aside.

Heat peanut oil in a wok and add onion. Stir fry until browned, then add ginger and garlic. Stir fry for one more minute.

Add roast pork and stir fry for about two minutes.

Add sauce ingredients, allow to thicken and reduce somewhat; cook for about one minute.

If you don't live in a place where you can find chinese pork (also known as Char siu) you can make it. This is from The Gourmet Cookbook:
BBQ Chinese Pork aka Char Siu
1 (1-pound) piece boneless pork butt or shoulder
1/4 cup hoisin sauce
1/4 cup soy sauce
1/4 cup Chinese rice wine or sake
2 tablespoons honey
1 tablespoon finely chopped peeled fresh ginger
1 teaspoon finely chopped garlic
1/2 teaspoon salt

Cut pork along the grain into long strips 1 1/2 to 2 inches wide. Remove and discard any sinew but do not trim fat. Transfer pork to a large sealable plastic bag. Stir together remaining ingredients in a small bowl until well combined. Add to pork and turn pork to coat, then squeeze bag to eliminate as much air as possible and seal. Marinate pork, refrigerated, for at least 4 hours.

Put a rack in lower third of oven and preheat oven to 375°F. Fill a 13-by-9-inch roasting pan with 1/2-inch water and place a wire rack across top of pan.

Remove pork from marinade, reserving marinade, and position pork strips 1 inch apart on wire rack. Roast for 15 minutes.

Meanwhile, bring marinade to a boil in a 1-quart saucepan (marinade may look curdled). Remove from heat.

Brush some marinade over pork and roast for 10 minutes more. Generously baste meat with marinade, turn each piece over, and baste again. Roast pork for 20 minutes more, basting 2 or 3 more times with remaining marinade.

Increase oven temperature to 400°F and roast pork until mahogany-colored and caramelized on edges, 10 to 15 minutes more (about 1 hour total roasting time). Transfer to a cutting board and let stand, loosely covered with foil, for 10 minutes. (Its internal temperature will rise 10 to 15 degrees as it stands.) To serve, cut pork across the grain into 1/2-inch-thick slices.

I had no recipe for the entire project. Just for the filling. So, I winged it/wong it and went badly.
bad cooking
It is not a delightful puff treat. It is anemic and tastes like flour. it is like cardboard on the sides and you have to tolerate the tissue paper with glue like outside to get to the delicious inside. I think I am just going to scoop out the filling and eat it plain, like any self respecting pork enthusiast might have done in the first place. I really can't blame the pastry.

booo.

tags technorati : pork, dim sum, bad cooking

Sandwich of Shame

try it. . . you know you want to. . .

recipe #115

Bacon at breakfast made me so happy, and Joy of Cooking from the 70s so interesting and full of such great retro food I thought I would make a good lunch from it.

That is when I found the Sandwiches of Shame.

I could only bring myself to make one of them, but I will post both shocking recipes.

The first is innocently named:
Peanut Butter and Tomato Sandwich *
Preheat broiler
Toast on one side:
a slice of bread
Spread the untoasted side with:
peanut butter
mixed with:
Chopped cooked Bacon
Bacon Drippings
You may top this with:
A thick slice of tomato
Season the tomato with:
1/4 teaspoon of brown sugar
salt and paprika
Put the sandwich under the broiler for 2-3 minutes.

Then, you are supposed to eat it. . . which I did. . . and . . . I . . . liked. . . it. . . .

If I were drunk I would have loved it so much I would have sat down and written a strongly worded thank you letter to Irma Rombauer and fallen asleep at the computer before I was finished.

My son liked it too, but he will happily drink his own bathwater, given the chance.

* Just so you know I made it will all organic ingredients on whole grain bread with tons of omega-3 to make myself feel less gross.

This sandwich is even more shocking, simply called:
Peanut Butter and Bacon Sandwich
Combine:
3/4 cup peanut butter
1/4 cup mayonnaise
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons pickle relish
1/4 cup minced bacon
Toast on one side
4 slices of bread
Spread the untoasted side with 'mixture'. Broil the sandwiches until the tops are brown. Slice them diagonally.

Irma suggest to, "try this combination on the unconverted." Ha!

I would try this as a closed sandwich, then deep fried. But again, only if I'd been drinking.

tags technorati : sandwich, shame, bacon, wrong

I am not loving Firefox 2

Not one bit. My bookmarks are a disaster.

Crawfish Bisque & Stuffed Crawfish Heads, interrupted.

crawfish heads, unstuffed.

Crawfish Bisque is, for the most part served with stuffed crawfish heads. I've never stuffed a head or made a bisque so I decided to put the crawfish in my freezer towards this project.

I filled a pot, threw them in a pot and boiled them. This is what it looked like when they were finished cooking:

grey sludge water

Red Flag. Disgusting water.

As the recipe directed I then started to remove the meat from the tail and separate the head from the bodies. This went okay for the first 1 or 2. Crawfish are kind of gross. More giant insect than tiny lobster. The 3rd of 4th crawfish I picked out of the pot looked like it had lived at the bottom of a toxic puddle for most of its life. I scrubbed it and the grey scum that covered the bottom of its body came off a bit but it looked like a job for ajax. Tossed that one. Picked up the next, same thing. In fact, about 70% of these guys were partially covered in sludge.

dirty crawfish? normal?

Is this normal?

Was I being paranoid and crawfish phobic when I decided to toss the lot of them? Seriously, if this is normal, I would like to know.

I have eaten plenty of bottom feeders, but never before have I come across one that needed to be scrubbed with ajax.

They came from Freshdirect.

I would really like to stuff some crawfish heads when I find some good ones. Back burner for this recipe until then.

Here is the recipe that I was going to use:
CRAYFISH BISQUE: A CREOLE DISH
(La Cuisine Creole, 1885)

Parboil the fish, pick out the meat, and mince or pound it in a mortar until very fine; it will require about fifty crayfish.

Add to the fish one-third the quantity of bread soaked in milk, and a quarter of a pound of butter, also salt to taste, a bunch of thyme, two leaves of sage, a small piece of garlic and a chopped onion. Mix all well and cook ten minutes, stirring all the time to keep it from growing hard.

Clean the heads of the fish, throw them in strong salt and water for a few minutes and then drain them. Fill each one with the above stuffing, flour them, and fry a light brown.

Set a clean stewpan over a slow fire, put into it three spoonfuls of lard or butter, a slice of ham or bacon, two onions chopped fine; dredge over it enough flour to absorb the grease, then add a pint and a-half of boiling water, or better still, plain beef stock.

Season this with a bunch of thyme, a bay leaf, and salt and pepper to taste.

Let it cook slowly for half an hour, then put the heads of the crayfish in and let them boil fifteen minutes. Serve rice with it.

UPDATE:
My sister, who is a chef, tells me I was being paranoid.